


Healing

by HoodieGirlSP



Category: Vocaloid
Genre: Character Death, Depression, F/M, Inspired Work, Minor Character Death, Please check the original works in the description!, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Violets, flokase, fukaflower, graveyard scene
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-04
Updated: 2020-10-04
Packaged: 2021-03-07 23:41:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,497
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26816008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HoodieGirlSP/pseuds/HoodieGirlSP
Summary: Inspired by the works of 02Aya on YouTube and 'The Disease Called Love' by NeruSummary:They've both been through a lot. If things had been different, maybe their pain could've been lesser. But that didn't matter anymore. Because now, they have each other.SPOILERS AHEAD! Please watch 02Aya's series through the links below before reading this!Friend - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VmVsle8aJ5UViolet - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gzBXSkGpBms
Relationships: flower/Fukase (Vocaloid)
Kudos: 7





	Healing

**Author's Note:**

> I basically wrote this while thinking: how would V (Flower's nickname in this series/AU) react to Fukase telling her that he had known him ever since he met Yuuma? 
> 
> Things kinda got messy around the end but I hope it's still an enjoyable read! Maybe in the future, once my writing skills improve, I'll rewrite this ^^;;;
> 
> Anyways, enjoy~!

> _ Bewitched by a sordid dream // this sick habit torments me _
> 
> _ Feeling faint and breathless from my love // I'm binded by the moment of death _

“Hey Yuuma,”

All was quiet in the mostly empty graveyard. It was a given; the hour  _ was _ late. Weak yellowed rays in the sky were sinking as hues of red began to streak its landscape. As children returned home in anticipation of dinner and as teens got packed into their cars and headed for the city, the white-haired girl stood stoically in front of the tombstone that she had previously been so obsessed with.

Her fingers fumbled over each other, a clear sign that her nervousness was unanticipated. After all, how do you revisit the past without getting absorbed by it again? How do you make sure that by confronting it for the last time, you don’t end up changing your mind and get sucked into it once more? Though such a feat had been done before, by the many people who had mourned the losses of their loved ones, V was sure that she wasn’t one of them.

A sigh escaped her lips. “Sorry that I haven’t been visiting,” V started, scratching her head bashfully as she stood before his grave. “It’s been… It’s been a while since I… talked with you, Yuuma,”

Deep down, she was frustrated.  _ Come on, V! You’ve rehearsed this a hundred times. Why are you so nervous now?! _ The hand that had been scratching her head before now twirled the single black strand in her hair, only adding to her not-so-subtle awkwardness.

Another sigh and a hesitant pause filled the air. “I… Well, I guess I should start with some good news,” She mustered a peachy frown on her face as she began to explain, the autumn winds brushing past her hair and making fallen leaves dance.

“Ms Megurine told me something pretty good the other day. I’ve… been a lot better since I last visited you, Yuuma,” V found herself nodding as she continued. “I still… get flashbacks sometimes, though, and I still need to take medicine for… you know…” 

She almost felt like stopping right there, but her inner consciousness managed to pull her back to keep going. “But it’s a lot less frequent now…! Even though I have to keep going for therapy, it really doesn’t feel as bad or as troublesome anymore…” She halted to clear her throat.

“I guess what I’m trying to say is, despite my progress being a bit slow, I’ve been… getting better,”

V didn’t want to use the word ‘fixed’. In fact, she  _ hated _ that word. It made it seem as if she was broken, shattered by all means.

The young lady tried really hard to pull off a small smile for the inanimate rock that she was talking to, but her efforts were in vain. V didn’t bother to try again after her failed attempt.  _ Besides, there… wasn’t really a point to smile at a grave. _

… … …

A small silence later and V’s mouth began to spew words on its own, specifically the words that she had rehearsed in her room over and over again. “The truth is, there’s a reason why… going for therapy isn’t as bad anymore,” Her mahogany eyes lowered as she stared at the engravings on the tombstone.

_ ‘Yamaha Roro’ _

She took a deep breath, recalling that one breakdown she had at the station, the one fraction of a minute when she clutched her head in desperation as those images kept repeating in her eyes. 

The depressing sight of Yuuma in bed. The shock she felt when he flatlined. Her frantic screams for help.

The panic that ensued as doctors and nurses tried to resuscitate him. The tragedy that bloomed in the ward when he was announced dead.

The utmost  _ terror _ that filled her entire being when she realised that  **that** feeling was coming back to her at the train station. Like she was losing-

“V?”

~~~~~~~~~~

> _ Deceived by a beautiful lie // it becomes a flower not suitable to meet with _
> 
> _ I even mistook this slow-approaching death // for a finale _

“V?”

A gasp hitched at her throat, cueing V to turn her head sharply to her left. It didn’t take long for her to recognise his red curly hair and scarred face, along with the odd little black flag in his hair that matched perfectly with his equally strange costume.

“Fukase?” V tilted her head at him, astonished at his presence more than his damaged skin. “What are you doing here?”

His scarlet eyes blinked. “Um… I uh…” Fukase gulped loudly as his mind searched for an answer. “Uhh…”

“Are those… violets?”

_ Oh right, the flowers! _ “I’m here to… visit someone,” He nodded as he gestured to the plants in his hands. “It took me a while to find these, but I really wanted to give him something special,”

He grimaced at the half-lie. It actually wasn’t difficult to find violets at the florist’s. No, the hard part was going through the process of buying the violets  _ without _ getting a traumatic flashback. And that took a  lot of pep talk to himself.

All V replied with was a simple ‘oh’, but judging by that droopy look on her face, the red-haired boy could tell that she was sympathising with him. Ever since they started hanging out more outside of their hospital visits, he had gotten used to interpreting many of her frowns. There were the frowns she made when she was ‘done’ with the topic they were talking about, the frowns she made when she was denying something that he said, the frowns she made when she heard him talk about…

Fukase shook his head absentmindedly.  _ It’s in the past, Fuka. Stop thinking about it. _

“Um, I’m sorry that I interrupted you,” He continued, breaking the quiet between them. “I just didn’t… realise that you’d be here,”

“It’s fine,” V replied, shrugging her shoulders. “You couldn’t have known. Besides, I won’t be here for long anyway,”

Now it was Fukase’s turn to tilt his head. “Why’s that?”

She sighed softly. “I’m just here… to say  **goodbye** ,”

That word made his heart sink and his eyes widen slightly. It reminded him too much of what happened with…

_ In the past, Fukase. It’s in the past. _

If he had halted his therapy long ago, he probably would’ve had a breakdown right then and there. Thankfully, he kept going, and so with his curiosity piquing, he asked her: “Goodbye? To whom?”

V chuckled and for a second, he was  _ sure _ that his heart skipped a beat. “Actually, since you’re here, do you mind standing next to me for a bit? I won’t take long,” Her question was replied with a firm nod as Fukase stepped closer to her, standing by her left as he turned to face the headstone she was visiting.  _ Wait a minute, this was-!! _

“Hey Yuuma,” She began to speak and Fukase took it as a cue to shut his mouth as quickly as he opened it. “I don’t think I’ve ever told you about him before, but here he is. This is Fukase,”

The young man in question had no clue how to specifically react but as a reflexive action of respect, he lowered his head in a short bow, as if greeting the grave before him. Next to him, V continued. “You know how I was saying that my therapy visits aren’t as bad as before? Well, I met him on the train rides to the hospital and… He’s kind of the reason why my visits aren’t as tiresome anymore, really,”

Inside, Fukase was startled, embarrassed and beaming all at once.  _ Did I just hear that right? I’m the reason why she doesn’t hate going for therapy? _ Despite the surging amount of joy and surprise bubbling in his chest, he managed to foresee the outburst he would have and swiftly closed his mouth to halt his words.

“D-don’t get me wrong!” V’s suddenly louder voice brought him back to reality as she cleared her throat and spoke again at her normal volume. “It’s not that I want to replace you or anything… I just…” She took in a deep breath and closed her eyes, collecting her thoughts properly before she said something that she would regret. Fukase waited patiently for her to open her eyes again.

“I just… I just want to move on,” She finally confessed, her voice filled with resolve. “I know it sounds selfish to say that, since it sounds like I want to forget you, Yuuma, but I’m not. After going through therapy and understanding what I’ve been feeling since you left, I’ve realised… the reason why I keep having nightmares about the day you died… is because I’ve been too afraid of letting go of you,”

Fukase didn’t know what came over him, but a proud smile found its way to his lips as he listened to V admitting her fears. “I keep remembering what happened that day because deep down, I don’t want to forget it. I don’t want to forget  _ you _ ,” V repeatedly shook her head a few times and raised her hand to her chest, crushing it to a fist. “But… to keep experiencing that over and over again… That isn’t how I want to live,”

“And I know you wouldn’t want that, Yuuma,” She shut her eyes tightly as she recalled the days when Yuuma would always joke around and try to make her laugh, despite his declining condition. Next to her, Fukase’s smile grew brighter. She really is getting better.

“You always wanted me to smile and be happy, even though you were suffering. Honestly, I think the past version of me wouldn’t understand why you’d say such things,” V managed to pull off another chuckle, though this one sounded sadder, and the boy next to her slowly raised his hand to pat her back.

“But…” She started again after a short silence, cueing Fukase to lower his hand. “Now I think I can understand why. You just wanted me to live my life and not wallow in the sadness, right?”

And finally,  _ finally _ for the first time in the evening, a small smile was inscribed on her lips. He didn’t outwardly show it, but the joy and pride in Fukase’s heart was  **overflowing** .  _ That’s right. Just smile like that, V. _

“So… I’m gonna do just that,” She declared, nodding respectfully at the grave. “I’m gonna go live my life and make wonderful memories for me to cherish. And… I promise you, Yuuma,”

**_“I’ll try my best to smile everyday,”_ **

Another autumn wind blew by as she finished, heaving a deep breath of fresh air.

He waited a while for the atmosphere to simmer down a little before he spoke. “Hey, good job, V,” Fukase commended, giving her the warmest of smiles. “Maybe I’m not in a place to judge you but… That was really good,”

V was pleasantly surprised. “Really? I felt like it was kinda… corny…”

“Whaaat? Corny?” Fukase laughed lightheartedly. “Nah, that wasn’t corny at all. You…” He lowered his voice. “You were coming to terms with your friend’s death, and that’s nothing to be ashamed of, V,”

Her eyelids still drooped a little. “Fine fine,” She mumbled dismissively before turning to face him. “Sorry that took a little longer than I expected. You said that you wanted to visit someone, right?”

“Uh, yeah. That’s right,”

“Go on ahead with it, then,” She kindly offered, patting him on the shoulder. “I’ll wait for you by the train station, just like last time, okay?”

Fukase’s eyes widened. “R-really?”

V nodded before walking away from the gravestone. “Sure thing. See you in a bit,” She said softly, not realising that Fukase wasn’t rushing to find the person he was visiting and instead, was still standing over Yuuma’s grave.

She did not expect him to start talking so quickly after she told him that she would wait for him.

“Haha… What a coincidence, huh, Yuuma?”

~~~~~~~~~~

> _ I just want to conceal the gap in my heart // but even though that should be the only difference _
> 
> _ I just can't replace it with any old gauze // I'm dependent on your warmth _

“Haha… What a coincidence, huh, Yuuma?”

She couldn’t believe her ears. In fact, the urge to prove herself wrong was what caused her to turn around, facing the direction of where she walked away from. Right in front of her was the spectacle of the red-haired boy kneeling down to place his neatly wrapped bouquet of violets onto the grave, his hand gently stroking their soft, waxy petals. A small, tender smile crept onto his face as he spoke.

“To tell you the truth, I’m kinda jealous,” He chuckled lightly, his mismatched eyes staring at the ground. “It seems like V really cared about you. You two must have been really good friends…”

It was difficult to pinpoint what she was feeling at that moment. The only thing V could do was stare at Fukase as he stood up, stuffing his hands in his pockets as he spoke again, a small smile inscribed on his lips.

“I guess I ought to give you a bit of an update on my end too, huh?” He chuckled lightly, seemingly oblivious to V standing merely a metre or two away from him, still within earshot. “Well, I might not be going to specifically your floor anymore, but I do still talk with some of the doctors sometimes. It can’t really be helped, I suppose. Bottling up any fears that I might have after my accident isn’t healthy, after all. Heck, I think I even had a bit of a relapse a few months ago,”

_ A relapse? Did Fukase… suffer from PTSD just like she did? _ Immediately, V’s mind floated back to that day on the train after she had snapped at Fukase, how he was staring at the ceiling for an indeterminate amount of time before suddenly wrapping his arms around himself, as if he was in pain. She recalled how he was so unnaturally quiet and distant during their hospital visits, how he stared off into space with his ruby red eyes that had looked so lifeless back then. The light and joy in them had been drained out, she noticed, and instead were replaced with a dead look that haunted her for the days that came after.

V felt a chill tingling down her spine. If Fukase had suffered a relapse recently, and if he had PTSD just like her, that would mean… 

“I didn’t go for therapy for a while after that,” The redhead continued, shrugging his shoulders sheepishly. “I guess that was my inner fear commanding me, but I really didn’t feel like it. I was just… too scared…” He shuffled slightly as he remembered how his memories came back to attack him, how those moments from the past replayed in his head over and over again. V could feel guilt crawling up her back like a snake. So it  _ was _ her fault that he stopped coming…

“But… soon I realised, that was a big mistake,”

_ Huh? _

“When I finally gathered the courage to go to the hospital, and I went to the train station again,” Fukase’s face lit up like a light bulb as he relayed his experience. “I saw V again. And this time, she looked really… happy to see me,”

_ Well of course I was! _ V mentally screamed, her hands involuntarily wrapping themselves around her arms, as if trying to comfort herself.  _ You stopped coming so suddenly, I thought you were… I thought you…  _

“I thought she’d be mad at me, you know?” He tilted his head to the side and shrugged again. “I really thought that she’d be annoyed that I stopped coming or that I didn’t tell her why. To be honest, when she was clenching her fists, I started to wonder if she really  **was** gonna shout at me again,”

_ But I didn’t _ . “But she didn’t,” Fukase spoke exactly what V was thinking as a smile found its way back to his face. “In fact, she was smiling at me. She was crying but… She looked so happy to see me, you know. I…” At this point, Fukase was awkwardly scratching his cheek like a school boy, his voice hesitating to say anything for a while as another autumn wind blew by.

“Look, I’ll get to the point,” He shook his head lightly, brushing away his previous embarrassment as he spoke confidently. “I know how much she meant to you, Yuuma. And I really don’t want to take that away from her, believe me,”

“But… After that day, when I saw her smiling at me…” The young man puffed a short breath of air. “I finally understood what you told me that day. You know, when you asked me to promise you that I’ll try my best to smile everyday, and then find a way to spread it…”

**“You… You knew that I would meet V eventually, didn’t you?”**

_ Did Yuuma really know Fukase? _

“So, here I am,” He declared boldly. “Trying to make people smile like you did. Still wearing these weird things that gave me wear. Can’t say that I get along with Hat-san though,” He laughed light-heartedly, recalling how the notorious little guy floated away from him again this morning. 

“But… I guess I’m also here, looking out for V everyday,” He smiled warmly. “She’s been opening up to me more and I’m really happy about that. Did you know she has a  _ ton _ of different frowns for all sorts of situations? I wonder if she had acted like that around you before, heh heh,”

The young woman in question felt like her cheeks were flaring up as Fukase started laughing again.  _ Did he really notice her ‘many different’ frowns? _ Breaking her bad habit of being a perpetual frowner was something that she desperately wanted to fix, but V knew that it was going to take time. Could Fukase really tell the difference in her facial expressions if she kept looking so sad all the time?

As he slowly stopped laughing, the redhead turned his attention back to the headstone, a wider smile on his face. “Anyways, I guess what I’m saying is, I think V’s been getting better and I’m really proud of how far she’s come. That’s also why… I’m gonna make another promise to you, Yuuma,”

Fukase knelt down again to stroke the petals of the violets on the grave. “I promise, I’ll stay by V’s side. I’ll make sure she always finds a reason to smile everyday, I swear it,”

V was flabbergasted at what she just heard. He wanted to make her smile everyday? But why…

_ Why would you do that for me?  _

The revelation of her realising that Fukase had known Yuuma before he died, along with the shock she was drowning in after hearing his words, were enough to cue her body to move automatically, maneuvering her to walk up to the kneeling scarred man, her face full of bewilderment and strangely, betrayal. As she towered over Fukase, eyes brimming with nothing but puzzlement, her voice came out in a quiet, raspy tone.

“You… You knew him…?”

~~~~~~~~~~

> _ The patients in possession of love // begging to have their small lives prolonged _
> 
> _ Are companions who want to endure // the rough treatment of the perpetrators for those who remember _
> 
> _ The patients are strangled together // with a red string of fate in a flat knot _
> 
> _ Making it hard to breathe, so it can't be undone // forcing them to depend on the anesthesia _

“You… You knew him…?”

Uh oh.

Those words registered themselves fast in his head, cueing Fukase to mentally slap himself as he realised his fatal mistake of not waiting for the snow-haired girl to leave the cemetery before he started talking to Yuuma. Now, she heard everything… And not in the way that he intended for her to.

“You knew Yuuma… before he died?” Her quiet yet firm voice brought him back to the matter at hand as she questioned him, the shock in her eyes unwavering. “Fukase, did you really talk with him before he… while he… was in the hospital?”

He didn’t respond, instead staring at the floor with his hands by his sides as he frowned, his mind growing through the possible ways he could approach this situation. Should he deny it? No, that’d only make her suspicious of him. Should he admit it, then? No, that would only cue her to ask why he never told her. Should he tell her everything about how he knew Yuuma and how he had seen her in the hospital before and how he-

_ Heck no! No way am I telling her that!! Not now, anyway… _

“Hey, are you listening to me?!” V’s desperate voice pulled him back to reality, her violet eyes staring into his soul as she pulled his arm, trying to get him to stand up. 

_ Her… violet eyes… _ The words reverberated in Fukase’s head as his figure slowly raised from the ground, standing there like a statue, not moving a single muscle.  _ No… Not again… _

“How did you know Yuuma? What happened? WHEN did it happen?! Tell me!!” One question after another poured out of V’s mouth as her tone grew hoarse and angry, her frustration overpowering her usual stone-faced demeanor and pouring out in her shouts. She trusted him! Heck, she trusted  _ both _ of them! So why did they have to keep such a secret like that?

_ Violet… violet… violet… _ He couldn’t stop that word from repeating itself in his head, the memories of his past that he so desperately tried to move on from now flooding his every thought. The day of his accident. His healing process. The day he felt heartbreak in the  _ worst _ way possible. Every memory, replaying in front of his eyes just like a movie…

_ Make it stop. I don’t want to see them. Not now. Not in front of her. Not- _

“Why didn’t you tell me? Why would you… I just don’t understand!!” A myriad of emotions churned her head; shock from the fact that Fukase knew Yuuma, betrayal from the fact that neither of them ever told her of their friendship, disappointment from the fact that she never noticed such a blatantly obvious connection between them… 

“Why would you care about me?!”

_ Because I want to. _

“Why would you make a promise to him like that?!”

_ Because he helped me. _

“Is he the reason why you’ve been trying to cheer me up?!”

_ … … …  _

V was grabbing him by his arms now, shaking them lightly, as if to awaken him from his silence. “Fukase, answer me-!”

**“And what if I did tell you?”**

~~~~~~~~~~

> _ My heart is pierced with a hole // but even though that should be the only difference _
> 
> _ Why do the blurred tear marks on your back // look as if they aren't going to dry? _

“And what if I did tell you?”

“ … What?”

As if awoken from a dream, Fukase’s eyes blinked twice as his head finally lifted up to look at V. “What if I did tell you that I knew Yuuma?” He asked again in a toneless voice and that was when she dropped her hands to her sides.

For once, those red eyes of his did not spark any of his iconic enthusiasm or joy. Those qualities were replaced by a cold and distant gaze, almost lifeless if it weren’t for his eyebrows furrowing downwards that indicated his guilt. Seeing this made V feel guilty of pushing him too far and she wrapped her arms around herself as she waited for him to speak again.

“I met Yuuma one day during my tests,” The redhead finally muttered, breaking the briefly quiet atmosphere. “It was a few days after my accident and… well, you know,”

The female teen didn’t need him to explain. He already told her before, about what happened to him before he went for therapy.  _ Though he never mentioned him having PTSD…  _ V quickly reasoned that he didn’t tell her about that since he didn’t want her knowing that he saw her in the ward before.

“He was really nice and cheerful. I couldn’t really understand why he was like that, to be honest,” Fukase added, his head turning back to the gravestone for a while. “Every time I met him, he’d be chatting with me about all sorts of things. Like how the weather was like or how his tests went that day,”

**“But I remember… The one thing he kept telling me… was that I should try to smile everyday,”**

Her eyes widened at those words. ‘Smile everyday’…

As he explained how Yuuma talked to him everyday during his time at the hospital, V could feel her initial anger slowly subsiding. Hearing Fukase talk about his time with Yuuma made her feel ashamed of her explosive attitude earlier. Why  _ did _ she get so worked up about him talking to Yuuma before he died? Why  _ did _ she feel like demanding how he knew about him so much? In the heat of the moment, had she really got possessive of who Yuuma spoke with? Why would she do such a thing for someone who’s already gone?

She should’ve just acknowledged that her best friend was his own person and that he was entitled to make friends with whoever he wanted to. But for some reason, V couldn’t handle that. Did it have to do with the fact that she didn’t want him to leave her?

Or… was it because… Yuuma was just like-

“I know what you’re thinking,” The scarred boy mumbled apologetically, the hands by his side clenching into fists. “And you’re right; I could have told you everything. I could’ve just said that I knew your best friend before he died. I should’ve done that, V. And I’m sorry for not saying anything,”

“But the thing is… back then and even now, I didn’t want to replace Yuuma in your life,” He admitted, a newly added tinge of hopelessness in his tone. “After seeing you try so hard to make him remember you and how you kept visiting him everyday, I didn’t want to make your life anymore complicated. You already had to be there for a person who was losing his memories day by day,”

_ “What was the point of making friends with someone else who suffered from post-traumatic stress and a horrible breakup? _ ”

His words left V speechless, her mind connecting all the pieces in her head together as he continued. “Besides, Yuuma was special to you, V. And you were special to him, too,” Fukase remarked wistfully, the slight jealousy he had for their close relationship appearing in his chest again. Though he managed to swallow it down for the sake of honouring his friend. “I didn’t,  _ and still don’t _ , want to take that position of being your best friend away from him. That’s why I never talked to you before that day at the train station, when you met me for the first time-”

“ … Idiot,”

~~~~~~~~~~

> _ The patients with only a few months to live // are supported by the IV of love _
> 
> _ The victim's sweet hopes are funerals // and the doctor's hesitant in showing their repentance _
> 
> _ The patients do not know how to live yet // and lie in their beds because of an unknown illness _
> 
> _ “A fever was the cause of the death” -- // An indecisive arsonist who should have noticed it in early stages _

“ … Idiot,”

_ Huh? _

Before he could respond to her comment, Fukase found himself being pounced on by the taller teen, her slender arms wrapping around him as if he would vanish if she let go. As she rested her chin on his shoulder, the young man felt his cheeks warming up lightning fast, his face turning as red as his hair in a matter of seconds.

_ Hold on… Is V… hugging me??? _

Before he could scream or shout or even visibly react to the situation, his ears caught the sound of wracked sobs from his right ear. Hiccups and gasps from someone who had been bottling up her inner frustration for a while and was now letting it out in the form of tears. A wave of empathy and concern flooded through Fukase’s whole being as he registered what was going on.

“V, are you… crying?”

“Who told you that you’re replacing Yuuma? Who?!”

Fukase was taken aback by her sudden outburst. “What-”

“No one is! And if I had known you back then, I-! Do you know how different things would have been?” With the truth out in the open, it seemed that the emotions that V experienced during Yuuma’s final days were returning to her. She couldn’t restrain herself from pouring out her feelings from those darkest moments of her life.

“Do you know how it feels to be alone in a hospital while the only friend in your whole life is on his deathbed?” She questioned him, clenching her fists so hard that her knuckles turned white. “Do you know how it feels like to lose the most important person in your whole life?”

“I was terrified, Fukase!” She admitted tearfully, laying her head on his shoulder. “I didn’t know what to do or how I should react to him dying, but all I know is that I was  _ scared to hell _ ,” She paused in the middle of her rant as she took a deep breath to calm herself. “And if you… If you had been there, I…”

“I wouldn’t have been so scared,”

“When you stopped coming to the train station, do you know how worried I was?” V continued as her tears kept on trickling down her cheeks. “Every time you weren’t there, I… I kept having this fear bubbling inside me, like there was something horrible going on and I couldn’t do anything about it. Do you know how worried I was?” She repeated her question from before as she lightened her grip on his body. Instead, her hands held onto his shoulders as she looked at him straight in the face, her eyes puffy and her hiccups shaky from crying. It was only then when Fukase understood exactly why she was acting so shaken up and why she was saying certain things that didn’t make sense.

She was scared. Hearing about why Fukase didn’t bother to talk to her when she was at her lowest point made scared of being alone again. Just like when Yuuma left her. Just like when he stopped coming to the station.

… She was having a relapse. Fukase knew that he had to help her again.

“V…” He whispered, a concerned frown prescribed onto his face. Just like how he helped her through her flashbacks in the past, he pulled Flower into a hug, the roles from earlier being reversed as his arms wrapped around her, intending to protect her from any external danger.

“I’m sorry. I know I’m not making any sense right now, but please just…” The snow-haired girl started to cry again upon feeling the kindness of Fukase’s actions, her words wavering but not stopping. “Don’t leave me again. I don’t want anyone to leave me anymore,”

_ “Please don’t take my light away from me…” _

Fukase froze and the heat on his cheeks grew.  _ ‘My light’? Did she mean… him? He was… her light? _

Although he was initially startled by it, the more he thought about it, the more it made sense. Logically, his cheerful attitude was a stark contrast to her gloomy and apathetic behaviour, perhaps more so since it resembled Yuuma so much (Fukase  _ did _ pick up the habit of smiling from the latter, after all). So if V had been in a dark place ever since her best friend died, then it made total sense that he had become ‘her light’ in the midst of her depression, right? Or was all this just the musical lyricist in him talking?

… He soon realised that he didn’t care. All he wanted to do was hold V in his arms and pray that she would keep recovering from her trauma. He didn’t care if it took another few more months. He didn’t care if it would take forever. He just knew he would be with her in every step of the way.

“Violet,” Fukase whispered really softly, hoping that she wouldn’t hear him. It was a risky move to call her by her real name, but he didn’t bother weighing the risk. It was her real name and  _ damn right _ was he going to address her that way.

Regardless of whether V responded to him, the redhead resumed, the warm fuzzy feeling of his adoration for her blooming in his chest. “I promise I’ll be there for you, V. Always. I’ll never leave you,”

“Never again,”

~~~~~~~~~~

> _ This disease is called ‘love’ // This disease is called ‘love’ _
> 
> _ This disease is called ‘love’ // This disease is called ‘love’  _
> 
> _ This disease is called ‘love’ _

**Author's Note:**

> To 02Aya: Holy heck you have no idea how much I love your story. As I'm posting this, I'm experiencing one of my worst creator's block and bouts of depression ever but rewatching your videos on YouTube for inspiration to write this has kept me going even through this dark time I'm having. So from the bottom of my heart, thank you so much for sharing your story with us. (also, thanks for inadvertently turning me into a FukaFlower shipper, hehe~)


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